


Symptom of Passion

by ShadeMyEyes



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-03
Updated: 2019-01-03
Packaged: 2019-10-03 11:25:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17283161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShadeMyEyes/pseuds/ShadeMyEyes
Summary: A fanfic I wrote about MU and Shura. I posted it on another site, but I figured I would edit it a little and post it here just for kicks.





	Symptom of Passion

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first fanfic, so it isn't the best. I enjoyed writing it and re-reading it, though; so if a few people like it, then cool lol.

A ways behind, I followed the seasoned thief to his tent; I almost felt like I could've been in a trance. "Shura? Shura!" I whispered, accosting him as I entered against his protests.

I watched as he began to search through a mound of garments; I imagined he sought after a shirt, but was glad when he didn't find it.

"Please try to understand, Lady Cécile, if I had realized who you were, I would've never—" his words broke off as he became more flustered. I could see that he wanted to retract, or at least rationalize, what he had done with me four nights ago. He started again, "You want my bow on your side, right? Then I must insist you avoid my company off the battlefield from now on. My face is not unknown, many people recognize me as an outlaw; the others wouldn't like to see you being friendly with me."

"Let the others think what they will," was my response as I sat myself beside him. He didn't pull away as I reached for the hands that, a few nights prior, had proven themselves quite dexterous.

"You're young and naive, milady; you haven't suffered enough to understand how easy it is to tarnish a good name… and how difficult it is to clear a reputation like mine."

I studied his profile at length while his eyes were yet averted from mine, favoring still the disheveled pile of garb. Even in this light, time displayed itself clearly on the features that had me intoxicated. He soon noticed I was staring, so I resolved at once to break the silence. And how. "Was it bad, Shura?" I could feel my face burn in some harsh shade of scarlet, "You were my first… it was probably terrible for you, huh?"

"I think you know it wasn't terrible," he replied. His countenance softened a little as he drew his hands from mine and placed one behind his neck, "But, gods… the hell made you wanna do that with some washed-up outlaw you just met?" He may have been better than twenty years my senior, but his cheeks donned a slightly rosy tint now, as well.

I scarcely knew how to respond, or what came over me as I settled myself on his lap, now straddling him. "You didn't exactly show displeasure, you know." He yielded as my reach sank down to unfasten his belt. Pressing his lips against mine, he would succumb to me once more as he lowered me to the ground.

Upon morning's arrival, I kept my eyes closed for as long as I could manage. When I next opened them, I knew I'd have to accept that Shura was gone; the warmth that he provided was all but faded. Pulling the covers tight over me, I could still detect traces of his scent; though an acquired taste, I had undoubtedly acquired the taste. It was reminiscent of the earth after a thundershower, matching well his look and mannerisms that captivated me so. I should have considered the disaster that I had provoked, and the devastation that had yet to come, but I, cursed with monomaniac tendencies, could think only of how much I wished we still shared the blanket. It was evident that he needed something good in his life, and I longed to be the source.

Now late in the morning, I could hear the others in the camp already employed with post-breakfast chores and training, and it crossed my mind that it might prove difficult to leave Shura's former dwelling undiscovered. Everyone knew it was his tent. Everyone had had their eyes on it since he joined us a few days ago. Nobody trusted him. I became aware that I was, at least a little, concerned for my reputation; I didn't want to be that girl, by which I mean, the easy one. Just last week, my innocence had seen twenty-one winters. I wasn't easy, just easy for Shura. But they couldn't know that, and now I had to find my way out unnoticed.

Crawling from his bedroll and across the tent's brief terrain, I made my way towards the entrance to assess my regrettable situation. I was paranoid, though understandably so: it would hardly be ideal for a princess to be caught fleeing the tent of a wanted man.

Alarmed by the proximity of my sisters' voices, I decided at once to stay concealed under the covers until the fall of dusk, when I would retreat back to my own lodging. I knew that everyone wondered where I was. I could hear them talk; I could hear them gossip about how I made a fast habit of watching the latest recruit, and with eyes different from the rest. They would watch his every movement with contempt and suspicion, while I was overtaken by enchantment; even a fool could have seen it.

Back in the safety of my own private quarters, I sat at the table musing over how I, for the first time in my young life, favored the cover of night over the light of the sun: was this another phase, or is this how I'd stay? It looked like a phase, a juvenile phase. The object of my obsession would've without a doubt chosen the sun, had circumstance allowed. But his path was cut out differently from most; this much I could see, though I didn't learn why. He would admonish me, I was sure, for voluntarily abandoning the light. And I did indeed abandon it, the moment I fell for Shura.

Late afternoon on the following day, I was obligated, though not inclined, to face the world once more. Tomorrow would be another battle and preparations needed to be made; I reluctantly put on my cloak and made my way to the mess hall. My thoughts were with Shura, wherever he might have been, but I made my best effort to bring them back when I started planning and reviewing the next day's battle tactics with the others. It gave my mind no ease that I could tell they wanted their questions satisfied: where I was the day prior, and what became of the 'dirty thief' who engaged in but one skirmish before his sudden disappearance. To my relief, they restrained alluding to their curiosities until I was gone.

The weeks went by and the war raged on, and I grew more miserable than I'd ever been. Not just mentally, but tangibly, too; I found myself heaving into a bucket on most mornings, and my back gave so much discomfort that I, even on a good day, could not stand up straight. I veiled my condition for as long as I deemed feasible, but I could obscure it no longer; if I stayed, my misstep would soon be discovered. They couldn't learn that their unwed princess was with child. With Shura's child.

One with my unmistakably poor self-discipline was unsuited for the position I held in our army; I was neither able-bodied nor able-minded. So, to prevent further dishonoring the Nohrian royal family, and also to forestall my own degradation, I gathered my belongings and departed one morning before dawn.

—————

Time passed, and I grew accustomed to a life that was scarcely befitting of a royal; I lamented not taking more from the treasury before disappearing, but I knew my thoughts were misguided. This must've been a little like what it always was for Shura: going from town to town, getting coin however he could, and trying to stay unseen.

I wondered how he might react if he learned he would soon be a father, though it would be unfair to provide him the burden of this news; my own desires were entirely at fault. I wondered at the chance that his sole heir didn't presently occupy my womb, and suffered a crippling jealousy before I distracted myself with other thoughts. Not pleasant thoughts, just other thoughts. Did he ever look back at our brief time together? I doubted it, after all, I did coerce him to join our cause and drive him away within a span of four days. Sometimes I would think of the Nohrian army and my family. I knew that the war was theirs to win; I heard as much at each inn where I stayed—that is, when I could afford a room. I had felt tremendous guilt since my departure, but I forced it to the back of my mind as best I could. I had no choice.

I was persistent in my tradition of asking around for Shura's whereabouts, and it wasn't a lie when he said his face was 'not unknown.' Almost everyone I questioned would scowl at me and walk away, and the rest just shook their heads and said they hadn't seen him as of late. But everyone knew who he was. Comments were directed towards me frequently; it's hard to take no notice of a woman who's about to burst, and who has no man at her side. Some even pieced together my plight when I asked about Shura. I never tarried in those towns.

Not long after Kana's birth, we settled in a village in Hoshido named Thebynth. I could eventually afford a small three-room cabin: a room for myself, a room for Kana, and the main room. The bustle of the town wasn't far, but behind us, we had our own private woodland. Kana's resemblance to his father was uncanny, and those eyes! how they shone. I loved him with all of my being, but it would be erroneous to assume I was forgetting about Shura; were there any hope for that, it would be gone the moment I next looked into Kana's sweet face.

Time flowed smoothly in Thebynth, and seven quiet years soon passed. One day, when we were out back in the vegetable garden, I caught wind of a band of thieves who came through town the night before; they made off well, too, from what I had heard. Still pining for him, all thoughts went directly to my coveted outlaw. I masked my curiosity from Kana as I inquired about Shura; living in this town, I was careful with whom I went to for answers, and I paid so that they might stay silent about my endeavors. To no avail; I didn't find out that day if Shura was indeed the leader of the gang, or what lucky village was next. My hopes were again grounded.


End file.
